I asked a seminarian recently what advice he would give a priest regarding human formation. He told me that every priest should have a priest mentor or accountability partner to check in with from time to time, someone outside of confession or spiritual direction, who knows him well, with whom he doesn’t necessarily hang out, but who he looks up to and trusts. While it is highly encouraged to continue receiving spiritual direction after ordination, an equal emphasis has not been placed on having a priest mentor or accountability partner who, like a good formator, will accompany, affirm and challenge. This partnership has the potential to maintain accountability in each — especially in the area of human formation. Great advice.

Our priesthood could benefit from having someone to walk alongside, even if not in a formal role. As the seminarian and I continued talking it became apparent that he had had a lot of experiences with priests who lived one of two extremes: putting human formation on a pedestal or neglecting it altogether. Removing human formation from the foundation of the other dimensions of formation (spiritual, intellectual and pastoral), or placing it above them, has the effect of throwing them out of balance; this can ultimately work against the spiritual counsels of poverty, chastity and obedience. When we place the human lens above the other dimensions, we can fall prey to being described as “bachelor kings” who, living lavish lifestyles, or collecting worldly treasures in an attempt to fill our existential ache, exhibit behaviors that are not only disorienting for the faithful, but also for us.

The other extreme is to place a low priority on human formation or to forgo it altogether. When this occurs, we may fall into the trap of over-spiritualization or hyper-intellectualization. These characteristics manifest when we find ourselves frequently escaping into the chapel or into books in a way that negates our responsibilities to the people to whom our bishop has entrusted us. The low priority given to human formation can also cause us to fall into workaholism, constantly on the path toward burnout in the pastoral dimension of our priestly life.

This is especially a danger when creative or administrative gifts don’t bring the successful outcomes we hope for, and thus result in feelings of resentment and bitterness. Wherever you find yourself on this spectrum, it can be challenging to find the right balance! Providentially for us, we are not alone — God promises to make all things new.

One way the Lord has been at work to renew my humanity has been through my assignment as coordinator of human formation at Borromeo Seminary in the Diocese of Cleveland. It has been a great grace (and an incredible challenge), to enter into this role which calls me to practice what I preach: human formation balanced with the other formational dimensions. Fortunately, the faculty at Borromeo developed four formation themes, or lenses, which were inspired by Pastores Dabo Vobis and the fifth iteration of the Program of Priestly Formation. These themes/lenses have been further developed to remain current with the spirit and philosophy of the Ratio Fundamentalis and the newly published Program of Priestly Formation VI. Each of the themes/lenses works to break open an aspect of human formation that finds its integration in the other three dimensions of priestly life. I have found these themes personally enriching for my priesthood and hope that you might, as well. The themes/lenses are masculine vulnerability, generative friendship, contemplative leisure and memento mori.

Masculine Vulnerability

Masculine vulnerability is about taking the risk of knowing yourself and letting yourself be known (cf. Ratio Fundamentalis, No. 45). The journey of self-knowledge is a perilous one; it takes courage, strength and humility to face the truth about ourselves. This journey is not meant to be walked alone — we were made for communion. This is where our brother priests come in. When we walk together with one who understands us in a personal way, and with one who is aware of and can empathize with the typical struggles that accompany priesthood, we will find understanding.

Here, we discover ourselves seen, known and loved in the areas where we might otherwise experience weakness and shame. It is from this place of being seen and understood that we gain the courage to take necessary steps forward to live our vocation in holiness and our priesthood to the full. It is often in spiritual direction or during a retreat that we might first come to an awareness of the areas of our hearts that need to be touched by Christ and healed. As we come to an awareness of our own story, growth in awareness of the patterns of sin that arise from these tender places comes to light; this can then be attended to especially by those mentor-brothers to whom we have entrusted ourselves.

Generative Friendship

The theme of generative friendship accompanies the theme of masculine vulnerability as it helps us reflect on our relationships with one another (cf. Ratio Fundamentalis, No. 95). The very idea of having friendships that are generative rather than selfish is a necessary concept, especially for celibate men who are called to chastity and healthy boundaries. Friendships with those we serve can be tenuous because of the responsibility that we have been given to shepherd these people in our care.

For this reason, too, we might benefit from priest mentors to guide us in our relationships with others. These trusted mentors can help name when we are grasping or holding too tightly to particular people, and when we have grown obsessive, possessive or exclusive in our relationships, especially with women. Having this accompaniment can help us to remain in a posture of receptivity for the care that God provides in placing good friends in our lives.

Discussing our desires and our needs with a brother priest, and receiving direction on how to receive and navigate relationships with others, helps us to enjoy the people God has placed in our lives and receive from them the care that God wants to give us through them.

Contemplative Leisure

While the themes of masculine vulnerability and generative friendship open up our hearts to the depth of communion with God and rightly ordered relationships with each other, the third theme, contemplative leisure, helps us to integrate our encounter with this reality.

Against our culture — which stokes the fires of anxiety and frenetic energy by measuring our worth according to our achievements — the theme of contemplative leisure helps our young men to encounter beauty, truth and goodness, finding meaning and value in doing something for its own sake (cf. Ratio Fundamentalis, No. 94). To this end, our men are encouraged to hike and camp, to take up a craft, to pursue the arts, to play an instrument — to get away from their screens and enter into reality (cf. No. 99). This helps them to examine their motivations and challenges the tendency to do things for the sake of how many views or likes they will get on social media forums.

As a priest, how often do you find yourself watching a movie, reading an article or book, or having a conversation with someone, all for the sake of utilizing it for your next homily? Contemplative leisure is about praying and playing for its own sake; praying and playing are ends in and of themselves. When we fail to pray and play, we become workaholics by making everything about the ministry we are performing — or we become escape artists, using food and drink, intellectual fetishes and screens, to get away from the anxiety of always “performing.”

Contemplative leisure is all about entering in, rather than running away from; it is healthy recreation or re-creation, and it helps us to operate from a deeper place of peace and harmony, rather than a place of emptiness and need.

Memento Mori

The fourth and final theme, memento mori, essentially teaches us that we are going to die. In a culture where people don’t like to think about death or mourning, people want to anesthetize the pain of the coming end of their lives — even down to shortening the grieving process by getting rid of wake services and funeral rites altogether.

Memento mori is as much about dying to self as it is rising to new life with Christ, and embracing that reality in small and large decisions. I was walking through a local cemetery recently with a friend who admitted that he doesn’t contemplate death enough, and thus,doesn’t contemplate the direction he is going in his life, nor think about what is most important. This is the main point of all of the lenses: to give our men the time, space and support to contemplate their telos (cf. Ratio Fundamentalis, No. 63). Doing so encourages growth in relationship with God and with one another as they are formed into the men and the priests God is calling them to be.

We need to be vulnerable with brother priests to remain accountable to the life of holiness and integration to which we have been called, and continually find healthy ways to be recreated along the way. The seminarian I mentioned to begin this article is certainly doing it — so well, in fact, that someday, if, God willing, he should be called to orders, I know that my own priesthood would be strengthened in his accompanying me on this way to the Kingdom.

Reflecting on these four lenses of human formation will help us each to pray deeply with how we are accompanying others, and our own need for ongoing, brotherly formation.

FATHER PATRICK ANDERSON is the director of human formation at Borromeo Seminary (College) in Cleveland.

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Interconnection of the Four Dimensions

The U.S. bishops’ Guide to Ongoing Formation for Priests notes: “The four dimensions of priestly formation — human, spiritual, intellectual and pastoral — are distinct but closely interconnected. They can be compared to the elements of the Lord’s cross. The spiritual dimension, represented by the vertical bar of the cross, unites us to God. The intellectual dimension, represented by the horizontal bar, takes us into the mind of Christ. The pastoral dimension, represented by the Body of the Lord, forms us to serve Jesus in our neighbor. And the human dimension, according to this image, is the soil in which the Cross is planted” (No. 104).

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