How to Nurture Hospitality
Lessons from Abraham
Father Jeffrey Kirby Comments Off on How to Nurture Hospitality
Hospitality is one of the oldest virtues of the Jewish and Christian faiths. While the Jewish and Christian beliefs in one God rattled the ancient world, the commitment of Jewish people and Christians to care for others and to show kindness to those around them — even those beyond their own people and to those who persecuted them — rocked the societal and cultural presumptions of the ancient world.
As with our forefathers and foremothers, so with each of us. We are called to shake the world around us by our universal and unconditional hospitality. As pastors and priests of the New Covenant, we are called to nurture hospitality in our communities and to labor every day to make our parishes places of hospitality.
As we seek to guide our parishes in becoming places of hospitality, the tent of our father Abraham at Mamre can be a great tutorial for us. As a people who desire to welcome others, we can glean lessons from this hospitable place and discern how we can best apply its witness to our own priestly ministry and to the culture of our parishes.
Man of Prayer and Hospitality
The tent of Abraham is the ultimate place of hospitality. At Mamre, God permitted himself to receive the hospitality of his servant. At Mamre, the feet of God were washed, and he was served a meal.
To understand the hospitality of Mamre, we have to understand Abraham. Abraham’s hospitality flowed from his interior life of prayer. If we want to truly grasp the spirit of hospitality and live by its demands, we must pray and pursue an active spiritual life. It is only prayer that can adequately expand our hearts and make them a source of hospitality to others.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church stresses the obedience of Abraham’s heart to the will of God. The Church highlights that — if we want to pray — then our hearts must be willing to submit to the inclinations of God within it: “Such attentiveness of the heart, whose decisions are made according to God’s will, is essential to prayer, while the words used count only in relation to it” (No. 2570).
If we seek to pray but close off our hearts to the will of God, we can easily fall prey to giving God empty prayer, which is mere lip service, without meaning or substance. If we can’t be open to God, then we will never be open to those around us. Any obstinacy to the call of prayer will play itself out in an obstinacy to show hospitality.
The Catechism points out, “Thus one aspect of the drama of prayer appears from the beginning: the test of faith in the fidelity of God” (No. 2570). If we are going to pray, we need to be willing to trust in the faithfulness of God. As we cry out to him in prayer, we must be confident in his goodness and be willing to wait for his answers. In doing so, we receive the hospitality of God.
By being the recipients of God’s unmerited hospitality, we are taught how to trust in God’s providence and to selflessly and generously give hospitality to others.
Any such posture of trust or submission to God certainly flies in the face of the messaging of our fallen world. We are told to trust only ourselves and to make things happen on our own terms. We are told to take care of our own and to be suspicious of others. However, the more we temper the influences of a fallen world, the more we can hear divine wisdom and open our hearts to prayer and hospitality.
Only after praising Abraham’s obedience of heart to the will of God and his life of prayer does the Catechism exalt the patriarch’s kindness and hospitality.
The Catechism teaches us: “Because Abraham believed in God and walked in his presence and in covenant with him, the patriarch is ready to welcome a mysterious Guest into his tent. Abraham’s remarkable hospitality at Mamre foreshadows the annunciation of the true Son of the promise. After that, once God confided his plan, Abraham’s heart is attuned to his Lord’s compassion for men and he dares to intercede for them with bold confidence” (No. 2571).
By exploring the interior life of Abraham and seeing how he received the hospitality of God himself, we can now explore the biblical account of how the patriarch welcomed and showed hospitality to God.
Hospitality of Mamre
The Book of Genesis, Chapter 18, recounts the encounter between Abraham and the LORD. We are told that Abraham was sitting at the entrance of his tent by the oaks of Mamre, a location in the southern portion of the Holy Land. He was seeking reprieve from the day’s heat. As Abraham looked up, he saw three men near him. As he saw the men, he ran from his tent — in spite of the heat of the day — to meet them. When he reached them, he bowed down to the ground.
The biblical narrative is fluid in its identification of the three. They are called men, angels and God. In clarifying who the three are, our theological tradition helps us to see the presence of God and how he is manifesting himself — how he is giving a theophany — through his angels under the appearance of men. Although mediated, God is present in Mamre! Abraham recognized something otherworldly — even divine — in the three who walked past his tent.
As Abraham reached the three and bowed to the ground, he said to them: “Sir, if it please you, do not go on past your servant (Gn 18:3). Abraham’s encounter begins with the hope of favor.
After making such a request, Abraham offers them water to wash their feet, bread to eat, and he invites them to rest in the shade of his own tree as refreshment from their journey. The three agree to accept the hospitality that has been offered. And so, Abraham asks his wife to prepare an overabundance of bread and cakes and orders his servant to clean a fattened calf. And then the patriarch himself took curds and milk, along with the prepared calf, and set it before the three. He remained standing while they ate under his tree.
While the three ate, they asked Abraham: “Where is your wife Sarah?” (v. 9). When Abraham responded that she was in the tent, one of them told him: “I will return to you about this time next year, and Sarah will then have a son” (v. 10).
The matriarch Sarah overheard what was said and laughed since she was both barren and past childbearing years. The LORD questioned Abraham about the laughter and asked: “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really bear a child, old as I am?’ Is anything too marvelous for the LORD to do?” (vv. 13-14). The exchange between Abraham and the three concludes with a declaration of wonder.
The encounter began with favor and now concludes with wonder. This is the story of Mamre. This is the power and potential of prayerful hospitality anywhere.
Lessons from Mamre
From the story recounted here, we can draw several lessons that can help us to mold and shape our own parishes into vibrant places of favor, welcome, acceptance, loving service and wonder.
Here are seven of the many possible lessons of Mamre:
1) Abraham’s tent was large enough for everyone, even the unexpected guests. In our parishes, do we nurture a “big tent” attitude by reaching out to others, welcoming them and regularly looking for creative ways to invite the broader community into the life of our parish? Have we allowed our parishes to become silos with only a parish-focused mentality? Have we lost our missionary impulse to others?
2) Abraham ran after the three in the heat of the day. It was uncomfortable and demanded a level of conviction in his heart. Abraham’s actions showed the sincerity of his welcome. In our desire to be a people of hospitality, are we willing to leave our comfort zones? Are we ready to feel awkward in our pursuit to welcome and accept others? Are we willing to go the extra mile and run the race that’s required to invite others to be with us?
3) When Abraham reached the three, he bowed down before them. In this gesture, Abraham honored his guests and showed them respect. In our dealings with guests, do we roll out the red carpet? Do we identify new faces at the parish and make a point to greet them? Do we see our guests and visitors as God among us? Are we willing to bow to the needs of others and carry their burdens?
4) Abraham offers water for the washing of the feet of his guests. In many respects, Abraham prophesizes the actions of Jesus in the Upper Room as he washes the feet of his friends. From such examples, we can see that holy people wash feet. Hospitable people wash feet. In our priestly ministries and in our parish’s life, do we wash the feet of the foreigner, the stranger, the visitor, the guest, the “other”? Do our ministries and programs all have aspects of outreach and selfless service? Do we defer to others, listen to them, and — following the call of St. Paul — seek to outdo one another in acts of kindness and selfless service?
5) Abraham greets his guests and initially offers them bread. The patriarch, however, exceeds the normal standards of kindness and gives his guests abundant portions of food and drink that were far beyond what anyone could have expected. He did so to give them comfort on their journey. Do we go above and beyond to serve others? Do we show by our actions the extent and depth of our welcome? In parish budgets, do we allot generous portions for hospitality, service and charitable outreach?
6) Abraham himself served his guests. He stood while they ate, which was the posture of a servant, always ready to fulfill the needs of his master. In our hospitality, do we approach others as servants or as benefactors? Are we willing to stand — dying to our own comfort — in order to serve and show our welcome to others? Is our parish staff and ministry leaders trained to fulfill these expectations of hospitality? When someone walks into our parish, are they greeted and served as God among us, or are they treated as a nuisance? Is our parish office and structure designed to accommodate the needs of others?
7) The encounter between Abraham and God includes Sarah and their future son. It concludes with God announcing the wonder that surrounds his presence. Do we see guests and visitors as opportunities to experience the wonder of God? Are we willing to tread the path of hospitality so as to see and feel the wonder of God through the care of others?
These are only a portion of the many lessons we can draw from Mamre. They are lessons that serve as an examination of conscience, and as we should seek to apply them to our own priestly ministries and to the culture and life of our parishes.
The Way of God
As Christians, we show what we believe through our actions. We speak of the one God, manifested powerfully in the life of our forefather Abraham, and of his love for humanity, affirmed and displayed in the love and selfless sacrifice of the Lord.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Hospitality as Evangelization
“If we want to advance in the spiritual life, then, we must constantly be missionaries. The work of evangelization enriches the mind and the heart, it opens up spiritual horizons, it makes us more and more sensitive to the workings of the Holy Spirit, and it takes us beyond our limited spiritual constructs. A committed missionary knows the joy of being a spring which spills over and refreshes others.”
— Evangelii Gaudium (“Joy of the Gospel”), No. 272
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
Such assertions are empty words, however, unless they take shape and are shown through our actions. Prayer and hospitality are equally a part of the way of God. Love for the guest has always been associated with love for God. The two cannot be separated. We see this lesson at Mamre. And with great effort and commitment, we can see it in our parishes. By applying and living the lessons of Mamre, our parishes can truly become spirited places of hospitality and kindness.
FATHER JEFFREY KIRBY, STD, is the pastor of Our Lady of Grace Parish in Indian Land, South Carolina, and the host of the daily devotional Morning Offering with Father Kirby.
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
Rome as a Center of Hospitality for Pilgrims
As part of preparations for Jubilee Year 2025 in Rome, Pope Francis met with Rome’s mayor and other government officials in Rome’s City Hall in early June. Pope Francis noted, “Pilgrims, tourists, migrants, those in serious difficulty, the poorest, the lonely, the sick, the imprisoned and the excluded are the most authentic witnesses of this spirit,” as he spoke to officials.
Pope Francis said, “Rome [must] continue to manifest its true nature, a welcoming, hospitable, generous and noble face.”
He added: “The enormous influx of pilgrims, tourists and migrants into the city, with all that it entails in terms of organization, could be seen as a burden, an obstacle that hinders the normal flow of things. In reality, all of this is Rome, its uniqueness in the world, its honor, its great attraction and its responsibility toward Italy, the Church and the human family.”
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….